Category: The Rest


pillrIf you’ve been living under a pebble under a rock under a boulder for the past few years and/or never saw The Matrix because “it’s actually overrated”, you won’t be familiar with the term “red-pilled”.

This word refers to people who have it all figured out and are now receiving facts and news from places other than the mainstream media – i.e. places that, okay, still have biases but, like, correct ones. Unlike the layman, a “red-pilled” person will be acutely aware of the hidden truths in society and all that secretly takes place under our noses, like the Jews being at it again, homosexuals deviously attempting to make the gay lifestyle look “a little TOO okay”, and all women being complicit in a conspiracy to not fuck him (which is their fault). Continue reading

Advertisements

In 2012, I wrote about how everyone and their grandmother were building some Swedish video game player up as the funniest and most awesome thing on the Internet for really no other reason than the fact that easily entertained children – and equally intelligent teens/young adults – went apeshit over his loud and random (therefore funny) Amnesia playthroughs. After I wrote about him, my blog views went from nothing to meh, but most importantly, I realized just how zealous, sensitive, and generally fucked in the head this fanbase truly was.

Ever since, I have longed to find a similar YouTube phenomenon; an even more unjustly celebrated e-celebrity with an even bigger cringe-horde of a fandom; anyone who has been paraded around as a “hip and cool” poster child for the website even more aggressively and who also became a foot-bullet for the company even faster than the guy who turned out to rely on “N-word” comedy a bit too much. With Logan Paul, his brother Jake, and the kids who watch their shit, I have struck gold again at last. Continue reading

If you hang out on either Twitch or among the skeptics and anti-feminists of YouTube, you may have occasionally heard of Steven “Destiny” Bonnell, be it through height jokes or complaints about how smug, arrogant, and all-around punchable he is. He seems to espouse many of the same ideas as the “social justice” crowd, but is notable in that instead of petulantly blocking the aforementioned skeptic types and right-wingers, this guy’s all about debating the fuck out of people and may not even be a true SJW as far as “not saying bad words” or posting Communist memes goes.

Continue reading

A critique I see remarkably often towards such films as Primer and Cloud Atlas is that they’re only meant to be watched by those who want to seem intellectually superior for doing so, implying they have little to no other merit.

This is interesting because – while I do enjoy both films in terms of script, production, and their bewildering yet significant ways of presenting their respective stories – the other big complaint I hear is that the movies are too confusing, no matter how simple they are to piece together upon a second viewing or even a second thought (at least in the case of Cloud Atlas). So if you’re used to people telling you that “you just don’t get it”, it’s probably because that’s the best you can do in terms of bitching about movies. And also because, yeah, sounds like you didn’t. Continue reading

Okay, so, an interdimensional ape-creature takes everyone’s favorite ungodly experiment, Jesus “CarpenThor” Christ, through a series of pocket-dimensions that represent his subconscious. As he finally learns who he is and what he’s lost, a decision is made.

Meanwhile, Norman Stillbourne and General Trax are furious that all their experiments and metahuman guinea pigs have been lost; Beast Boi starts seeing more and more repressed memories in his dreams; Kingpinferno remembers an old enemy, and Tharkseid gets ready to assimilate a new member of his next generation of followers. I hate myself.

DISCLAIMER: This is a comedic article and if you truly have problems you should talk to a therapist and not me. But please do if you want, I am hilarious.

A lot of people who seemingly haven’t suffered enough will tell you to “Fake it ’til you make it”. Now how true could that be? If you claim that you’re doing great whenever someone asks you how you’re doing, surely it won’t help you actually feel less shitty? Continue reading

oni-sionIt’s been a long time since I talked properly about YouTube’s favorite cuckold and very happy man Greg “Onision” Jackson. This is mainly due to the advice I’ve received from fans of his after writing about him, namely that I should just stop paying attention to the guy if I don’t like him, as if to say that hating Greg as a person would make me unable to enjoy watching his meltdowns on a monthly basis.

Anyhow, I did leave Gregory alone for a while after doing a quickie on him last year. I’m sad to say, however, that He Who Wins Debates Against Sock Puppets is at it again. When he’s not busy watching his wife get intimate with a teenage girl whom the wife later cheats on him with (polygamy works, guys), he’s apparently looking at fangirl-submitted selfies and telling the senders how “beautiful” or “disgustingly unhealthy” their half-naked bodies look. And as you may have guessed, it has been noted several times, more so in recent days than when he supposedly started the forum itself, that not all of these girls are of legal age. Uh-oh… bro. Continue reading

Now excuse me while I dab at some imaginary Pokémon from my hoverboard and capture them on an exploding Samsung phone that plays decibel-boosted, bass-boosted, auto-tuned “n*gga trap” and hilarious 6 second videos about white shoes whilst literal clowns (and Harley Quinns) chase after me and I contemplate the fact that a borderline fascist babyman is the most powerful person in America even though I could have sworn Ghostbusters defeated sexism, all before I purchase a ticket for Remake 2: The Sequel, “challenge” my friends to stand completely still, marvel at how much cooler my selfies get when I add a dog nose, publish a think piece about how emojis and unfunny frog memes are the most racist thing to have happened all year, twerk to Rihanna’s “Gibberish”, and also mourn all the influencial celebrities that left us this year – none of which hit me as hard as that one gorilla whose name I can’t remember.

H A P P Y   N E W   Y E A R ,   H U M A N I T Y .   G O O D   J O B !

One of my favorite musicians – certainly one of our culture’s most influencial ones – left our plane of existence today. But, particularly in wake of recent events, we may just need the writing of Leonard Cohen than ever. That’s how most great artists survive after they leave, isn’t it? The world changes in some ways, but their commentary never cease to make sense.

After all, I can think of a certain politican who might lose his temper and, say, take Berlin any day now. Probably a lazy example but you get the idea.

Good night, Mr. Cohen.

uhm

Two million years ago, Ian Carter of iDubbbzTV gave us his informed take on so-called Toy Channels; that popular fad on YouTube in which unfunny parents will showcase random toys and give them to their kids, only for their viewing figures to crack six digits because evidently shit like this is entertainment gold. It’s basically a new way for people to make a quick buck off of their children’s cuteness in exchange for letting said children become spoiled brats who will henceforth be used to getting a bigger, more annoying version of Christmas every week.

However, there was something in iDubbbz’s video on the matter that didn’t quite fit. At timestamp 5:48, there is footage that doesn’t seem to connect or even relate to the other Toy Review Channels within the vid. Instead, I think Ian tried to warn us that the worst was yet to come. A trend even less deserving of being popular. An idea for content even more fascinatingly inane. Here’s the video, first of all: Continue reading