Category: News


I decide for once in my life to follow through on one of my New Year’s resolutions and vow to stop writing about PewDiePie, and instead I get to deal with this shit.

A few days ago, the Disney-owned content network Maker Studios revoked their partnership with the Internet’s main protagonist Felix “PewDiePie” Kjellberg, after his most recent videos were shown to be a little too meaninglessly offensive even for him, containing “ironic” anti-Semitism and one or two “Heil Hitler” salutes. This has also resulted in YouTube (the company, not the users) distancing themselves from their #1 superstar, cancelling his planned YouTube Red show, and the rest of the World Wide Web to mobilize to his defence.

Fanboys, fangirls, and social media commentators – including but not limited to shoe0nhead, Chris Ray Gun, Sargon (with guests) and h3h3productions – have already said their fair share about how slanderous/unprofessional the journalists covering this story are, how the actual context of the Nazi comedy is disregarded completely, and what a violation this is to freedom of speech. At least this is true for the social commentators and rant vloggers; the fanboys and fangirls spend most of their time blubbering on Twitter while blindly creating “Support PewDiePie” movements without looking at any data. Continue reading

Now excuse me while I dab at some imaginary Pokémon from my hoverboard and capture them on an exploding Samsung phone that plays decibel-boosted, bass-boosted, auto-tuned “n*gga trap” and hilarious 6 second videos about white shoes whilst literal clowns (and Harley Quinns) chase after me and I contemplate the fact that a borderline fascist babyman is the most powerful person in America even though I could have sworn Ghostbusters defeated sexism, all before I purchase a ticket for Remake 2: The Sequel, “challenge” my friends to stand completely still, marvel at how much cooler my selfies get when I add a dog nose, publish a think piece about how emojis and unfunny frog memes are the most racist thing to have happened all year, twerk to Rihanna’s “Gibberish”, and also mourn all the influencial celebrities that left us this year – none of which hit me as hard as that one gorilla whose name I can’t remember.

H A P P Y   N E W   Y E A R ,   H U M A N I T Y .   G O O D   J O B !

One of my favorite musicians – certainly one of our culture’s most influencial ones – left our plane of existence today. But, particularly in wake of recent events, we may just need the writing of Leonard Cohen than ever. That’s how most great artists survive after they leave, isn’t it? The world changes in some ways, but their commentary never cease to make sense.

After all, I can think of a certain politican who might lose his temper and, say, take Berlin any day now. Probably a lazy example but you get the idea.

Good night, Mr. Cohen.

Well folks, it’s confirmed! All the 4chan regulars and Extremely Manly Males who kept chanting the statement “when Trump wins” (surrounding clauses may vary) whenever liberal opinions would rustle their jimmies were evidently not bullshitting us after all.

Now, I know that I’ve said some disparaging shit about Donald Trump in the past. You’re probably expecting me to complain incessantly about what a dark time this is for the economy, non-white Americans, women, immigrants, citizens with disabilities, anyone in the LGBT community that isn’t named Milo, and trigglypuffs. I won’t do that, though, as I my views are no longer influenced by unreliable news websites with political biases or agendas. Instead, I get all my facts exclusively from right-wing outlets and libertarian podcasts, hence I can briefly cover the U.S. election aftermath without clouded judgement and with the understanding that Mr. Trumpet is the best president to ever be voted into office ever. In the Universe. Continue reading

Everything Wrong With YouTube – PART II

I’ve more or less come to a decision: I am not going to pursue a career in video-making. Yes, I love making short films and yes, I do post on YouTube with decent frequency, but it’s not a smart career. Trying to make money off of it can’t possibly be a good option; not when you consider all the shit content creators have had thrown at them by now, all within the span of one year.

We survived the kerfuffle of the automated and/or fraudulent copyright strikes that only fell upon video makers who had Fair Use on their side whilst sparing those who would steal entire videos just to “react” to them, and we lived to see another day after entire YouTube channels started vanishing due to false accusations of breaking OTHER community guidelines. But now something else has happened. Something that neither robots nor butthurt film directors are culpable for. Continue reading

It’s really quite amazing how little it takes to convince Creationists of anything. It’s almost as if people who still insist on thinking that the Earth is 6000 years old are kind of easily duped.

In Kentucky, a supposedly 100% accurate replica of Noah’s ark recently finished construction after having been in the works since 2010. Its purpose is to prove that the stories of Noah’s ark are true (which is about as effective as building a life-sized version of Hogwarts to prove wizards exist) and to enlighten those who have been blinded by the lies of science. Right, ’cause everyone with their eyes open know that scientists are bullshitting us about the notion that animals are kind of prone to killing each other, regardless of how much it’s raining outside the impossible cruise ship they’ve been shoved into. It’s not like you can go outside or visit Australia for six minutes to verify this. A similar thought process goes into the Creationist “theory” that scientists are also lying about evolution, even though people getting themselves killed playing Pokémon Go should be proof enough that Natural Selection is a thing. Continue reading

Stephen is back and he’s truther than ever. Today, he exposes the biggest government lie yet. Watch this video and learn!

I’m not gonna say so much on this besides urging you to watch this video made by I Hate Everything after recently having his channel removed by YouTube for, well, stupid reasons. He talks about how channels more popular than average are far more likely to get to stay up, no matter how severely they break the website rules (since that’s the kind of effortless and redundant shit that gets hits and thus makes YouTube more money), but also about the fuzz he managed to cause when his channel was taken down by going public with it. He didn’t just get his fans to support him on this, but he managed to get some really big names involved like JonTron, YourMovieSucks, Jacksfilms, GradeAUnderA, h3h3productions, iDubbbzTV, Chris Stuckmann, and many more.

Thanks to all of this, his YouTube channel is back up. But this still needs to be seen and the shittiness of the YouTube company needs to be acknowledged, as well as the lack of power the average content creator has. This isn’t just about faulty automated systems, you see. It’s also about people – sometimes other, more powerful (read: profitable to YouTube) users – filing flimsy copyright complaints against these channels and taking advantage of the broken system to destroy content creators they think are in the legal wrong or just randomly don’t like (see iDubbbz vs. “Toy Channels” and IHE vs. Derek Savage).

So watch the video, guys. Now, preferably.


UPDATE: More fishy YouTube business, folks. It appears the defective copyright system has been affecting Doug Walker of The Nostalgia Critic too. He came out with the following video, highlighting that more and more channels have been wrongfuly accused of copyright infringement and unfairly deactivated for little to no reason lately, bringing up the aformentioned IHE debacle as an example:

You heard right. At this point, he is so fucked by YouTube that neither he nor his Channel Awesome colleagues have even gotten paid for their latest vids and Nostalgia Critic episodes. Knowing this, I’m surprised he even managed to remain as cool as he is in that vlog. Great, YouTube! Just go ahead and encourage ignorant copyright claimants to make life shit for those who are well within Fair Use with their vids whilst letting those who explicitly break the community guidelines, e.g. Reaction Channels (when it comes to copyright) and “Prank Channels” (when it comes to literally everything else), keep doing what they do. As long as  they’re popular enough to generate sufficient amounts of clicks and money, right?

And before any of you old-school Channel Awesome/That Guy With The Glasses fans sic LordKat on my ass, I’m aware that these content creators can be wrong in naming Fair Use as a justification for their usage of copyrighted footage (and also that Walker himself isn’t spotless when it comes to fucking over content creators working “under” him). Still, I maintain that everyone deserves a chance to defend themselves before losing their channel.

To come full circle, here’s another IHE video about what a mess the YouTube website is for content creators at this point:

This shit is starting to worry me. What if I’m next in getting banned for some stupidly fallacious reason and without warning? No way am I gonna get the support IHE got in order to have his channel restored. I’m hoping this clustershit is sorted out before that, however; hopefully by one or more human beings who actually work at YouTube and not some computer that mistakes everything for copyright infringement and rule-breaking (and plagiarism, something I imagine bigger channels like The Fine Brothers are gonna have a fucking blast taking advantage of). Please.


UPDATE 2:

Enough said.

Heroes

We can be heroes. And sometimes villains.

All within the same week, much has happened. Ziggy Stardust returned to the stars, leaving an immense musical legacy behind, and only a few days later, it was reported that Alan Rickman has passed away. In both instances, the cause of death was cancer.

I will always remember first seeing David Bowie in films such as Labyrinth and eventually growing fond of his music, and as for Rickman, I regret to say that his roles in Harry Potter and Die Hard reached me much later in life than his roles in stuff like Help! I’m A FishGalaxy Quest and that lousy Hittchhiker’s Guide movie. Either way, I will remember these two men fondly, and the world of entertainment shall as well.

Farewell, my friends. Send my regards to Lemmy and Angus Scrimm.

__

Rest in peace David Bowie, 8 January 1947 – 10 January 2016

Rest in peace Alan Rickman, 21 February 1946 – 14 January 2016

A couple of months back, Adam Johnston of YourMovieSucks fame uploaded the following film review to his YouTube channel, initiating a cult following for the remarkably child-loving furry hero known simply as “Cool Cat”:

In case you’re too frightened to click that thumbnail, Cool Cat is basically the favorite creation of Hollywood-based filmmaker Derek Savage, and his entire concept with the Cool Cat character is to teach valuable lessons to children about gun safety, bullying, crimes, and other things that the movie in question seems to have an at best vague understanding of. Nonetheless, Savage seems at first glance like he’s just a nice and friendly old chum who, in spite of how stupid and low-budget (and often creepy) his film comes off to some, really just wants what’s best for kids and hopes that they’ll grow to love his “groovy 90’s kid” feline character. It especially seemed that way when his response to the YMS review was befriending Adam and letting him be in his next movie (I have a feeling it is about gun self-defense and women). He probably doesn’t take it too seriously if grown-ups make fun of his work because his heart is just in such a gosh darned good place, right??

Hoo boy howdy, just you guys wait, ‘cuz that’s only what happens if your review results in Savage getting a vaster following and getting to sell more Cool Cat merchandise thanks to the exposure your review gets him, even if your review is still technically negative and all of Cool Cat’s new fans are mostly ironic. However, if your review allegedly only sends a bunch of trolls Savage’s way, or just critiques the movie in a way that’s more obvious in its negativity, be prepared to get the same treatment this poor sap got: Continue reading