Everyone’s favorite superhero is finally back with a brand new season (last episode here) with better camera work and shittier Rockstar Editor export quality (forgive me). This was meant to be a filler episode where Jesus “CarpenThor” Christ squares off against Impotent Rage, a much more beloved newcomer in the superhero game. But then I accidentally wrote in a bunch of important plot progressions, timely commentary/satire, and a scene where an old lady fires a minigun at people. So I officially can’t even do boring filler episodes right. I am worthless.
The plot: Jesus “CarpenThor” Christ awakens after his encounter with Sinistor to find that a new metahuman, Impotent Rage, is being idolized and celebrated for that which makes CarpenThor and his peers outcasts. This is all very relevant. Meanwhile, a disguised Lex Jewthor returns to the place where his family died only to make a horrific discovery, Misty realizes that the military is after her, Diana gets herself involved with the people at Fort Zancudo after getting too close to the human world with her new boyfriend Beast Boi, Chesterfield grows tired of his abusive boss Norman Stillbourne, and Ghostbones Skullrider sees an oppurtunity in the arrival of Impotent Rage.
Also there’s an old lady with a BFG at the end. Enjoy.
I made this stupid shit a while back for educational purposes. Are you tired of writing political cartoons with subtext and clever commentary and wish you could just label everything so that you instantaneously know what all the metaphors mean and who the objectively bad people are? Have you always wanted to see Powerpuff Girls but with Sargon, Milo Y, and The Golden One? Well, sonny, this vid’s for you! Continue reading
I’m told the real winner is Beyoncé.
How about that timing, huh? The Oscars are finally colorful and diverse enough to most people’s liking, with such impactful films as Moonlight, Lion, Fences and most appropriately Hidden Figures getting proper recognition in most areas, acting included, as well as such documentaries as I Am Not Your Negro and Ava Duvernay‘s 13th.
So what do we learn at almost the exact same time as the announcement of this year’s nominees? Oh, just that Donald Trump’s proposed “Muslim Ban” would ensure that Asghar Farhadi, whose Iranian film The Salesman received a nomination for Best Foreign Language Film, would not be able to enter The United States and attend the ceremony (and even as it was revoked, Farhadi refused to appear either way as an act of protest). Well done yet again, guys. Things are looking “great again” already. Oh well, at least it was well-intentioned and meant to make sure that all the countries with confirmed ties to the 9/11 attacks no longer have easy access to the Americ-OH WAIT! Continue reading
While you were busy watching live inaugurations and punching perfectly innocent Nazis (yes, I seriously just typed that), Stephen has been doing research around the clock on this one aspect of the Pizzagate conspiracy that’s so nightmarish that nobody has thought of it yet. Be warned: massive red pills ahead but for God’s sakes THINK OF THE CHILDREN!
This is not satire.
The episode where the shizzle hits the fan. Jesus “CarpenThor” Christ notices the presence of a mysterious chess-master known as Sinistor (played by a GTA Online version of yours truly), who’s either loyal to the military, the dark lord Tharkseid, or both.
Meanwhile, Lex Jewthor escapes captivity; Misty discovers the truth about her new mentor Wilfred; Ghostbones Skullrider is told to look up a methuman who may just have returned from the grave; Beast Boi and Diana fight off the vengeful Mannibal one last time; Norman Stillbourne tries to impress his father with the military’s weaponization of metahumans to no avail, and Stillbourne’s sycophantic servant, a monster named Chesterfield (yes, seriously), realizes how abused he truly is. This will be my last episode for a while. Surprisingly, doing shit like this for a year gets kind of old after a while.
In memory of Debbie Reynolds. Sort of.
Don’t follow me on Instagram.
Hey, folks! Here’s hoping you’ve all had a merry Christmas and that you’ve rubbed it in the faces of those who either hate the holiday or think that everyone’s in on a conspiracy to take Jesus out of it, as if the birth of Christ is what Pagan traditions are typically about.
Mine, for one, was pretty good. The gifts I received include various Blurays (such as a Star Wars box set for the whole family), books like Thing Explainer and a Dark Crystal prequel, various forms of candy, and the obligatory bottle of liquor. Stuff I gave out, meanwhile, included a Little Prince DVD, champagne glasses, a Star Trek Beyond 3D Bluray (sorry), an old Swedish comic that my grandparents love, and a bottle of hairspray which I made the recepient think was a dildo. Then there was the Christmas party I had with the schoolmates where we played that gift-game with a dice and I went home with drink flavoring and new Apple headphones, because yes, I will in fact support Apple insofar as willingly getting their stuff for free.
I also gave my brother the new Age of Empires 2 expansion, ensuring that we won’t have productive lives this upcoming week, as well as a cookbook with deliberately shitty recipes. And both of us got our parents a deep fryer and booze, among other things. Sometimes it almost feels better to give.
Seriously, though. Happy holidays! More posts will come soon!
Some of the highlights from various bad videos that we’ve slapped the dumb “Skefnarm Pictures” name onto throughout these five years. It all started when three high school students got together, discovered their mutual love of filmmaking, stole a channel name from a made-up word in a Swedish radio show, made a shite stop-motion animation called Send in the Clones, and basically lost touch with each other a few years after that. Have fun!
Two new videos today, folks, but only one that can be viewed internationally until I make use of my impending college degree and start translating some of my vids. That video is the new CarpenThor because yes, I am in fact still making these. This one features yet another animal-shapeshifter, more death than usual, and also some Jon Sudano.
The next video is a little trickier. It’s an episode of me and my brother’s Swedish show Victor Käkar, in which I eat stupid things and give the “meal” an inept and nonsensical review. In this episode I eat an egg with hot sauce, the results of which are amusing enough, but the selling point is my brother Oscar’s first-rate editing and visual effects work. So I recommend watching it for that (and the anime/MaxMoeFoe references) at least. If you want to skip all the talky bits (which’d be a shame, considering the “emo” commercial we did with our youngest and edgiest brother), that’s fine and good. Either way, click here:
Our first video today is one in which I feature as The Shade from DC Comics (it’s a Halloween costume, calm down) and give you some hot tips for a succesful Halloween night. Be sure to abide by these and have the fright night of your life. And watch out for clowns, especially Harley Quinns!
† H a p p y H a l l o w e e n †
Next up is the next episode of CarpenThor.
A man who can transform into animals, named Frank (aka Beast Boi), laments the hateful stigma humanity has against his kin. Meanwhile, CarpenThor and Wilfred are brought into the secret world of Mymbranes, metahumans like Beast Boi who specialize in taking on the form of animals; Misty finds herself ensnared in the ensuing drama; Ghostbones Skullrider keeps searching for new additions to the army of Tharkseid; Diana meets an old associate, and Lex Jewthor fears that his wife Lois is growing far too powerful for him to handle, all while he himself inches closer to the clutches of General Trax.
There’s even more stuff going on than that but Beast Boi (played by Franklin) is by far the coolest thing in this entire episode and possibly the series as a whole. I would totally carry his children.
Jesus “CarpenThor” Christ continues running vigilante errands for his shady mentor Wilfred, as he contemplates his growing crush on Misty the telepathic store clerk; Diana Leech feels that the citizens she’s trying to protect live in fear of her and her kin; Lex Jewthor keeps searching for the artifact that turned him metahuman; Lois Jewthor’s powers grow stronger and more dangerous; Willammar Gaddafisk lurks around in prison, and Tharkseid uses the artifact to convert a new desciple: a tough but dim-witted bounty hunter named Ghostbones Skullrider. His real name is, of course, Red Cross. That’s three Marvel references in one! I’m the damn best!
Also here’s a response I did to CinemaSins’ blasphemous Everything Wrong with Shrek video. He was lookin’ kind of dumb.