All my exams are handed in, my freelancing profile isn’t doing me any favors, and I am essentially on the closest thing I have to summer vacation. Now, it doesn’t matter on what day summer vacation starts for me, since it’s always going to precisely coincide with a rainy period either way (that’s Sweden for ya). So fuck it, this would be the perfect time to release another post where I answer general questions about myself. ‘Cuz you guys really love those, right? Just kidding, you’re not reading this.


“What do you hate most about YouTube these days?”

I guess the broken copyright claiming system still fucks YouTube creators pretty bad while favoring the claimants, no matter how legit. The fact that those users get demonetized while “family prank” channels and disturbing children’s videos featuring copyrighted characters get to stay online; that’s pretty terrible too. Oh and YouTube drama being illuminated is getting kind of old I guess.

I miss when the most popular stuff on YouTube included inept shit like Fred and Equals Three, and all the drama was mostly limited to smaller communities full of socially incompetent losers with web cameras and too many opinions. Back when names like Fakesagan, Coughlan, and Thunderf00t (this was before I learned he has a PhD and is, in fact, not a loser) were being thrown around, and ranting about feminism didn’t grant you one of the most popular channels on the site, e.g. Sargon of Akkad.

I don’t know, man. YouTube is just kinda messy.

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“Why do you listen to such weird-sounding music? Kraftwerk, Aphex Twin, Infected Mushroom? Whaa?”

Because I don’t hear it anywhere else (and “popular” isn’t generally a great genre). Oh and the stuff mentioned are either very influential or very creative in its experimental nature so I thank you.

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“Why do you tackle politics so much these days? I miss when you didn’t care about anything and just shat on everyone who even bothered. Also, are you more leftist now? I thought you were a centrist?” 

It’s not that I’m a centrist so much as I reject the idea of ascribing labels to myself and letting people decide in advance if I’m worth listening to based on whether my label is agreeable to their politics of choice. They already “know” who’s correct. Centrists get a lot of shit for having no secure position on anything and not choosing a side in spite of the fact that, and I’m literally quoting a liberal when I say this shit, “one side is objectively right”, because saying shit like that doesn’t prove any point any centrist has ever had regarding ideology labels and tribalism, right idiot?

But no, I myself am not a centrist, nor does actually looking at newer, more nuanced studies on sexual biology or regularly curb-stomping conspiracy bullshit automatically make me apt for the “leftist” label. If you want to be technical, however, it would seem that I’m a leftist and a feminist, but if I start using those words to describe myself you probably won’t need to wait long until someone from that camp petulantly lectures me about why I am NOT those things and why I’m not doing enough to “earn” those titles. (For instance, I don’t agree too much with socialism and I disagree that throwing rocks at Nazis is effective in teaching people that violence and fascism are, you know, bad)

In an ideal world, I wouldn’t land on either the right, the left, or in the middle. In an ideal world, I would sort of exist outside the spectrum altogether and just look at the world as it is. No automatic ignorance against opinions that come from more “privileged” individuals, no whining about being “pro-science” and then actively ignoring updated gender biology becuase it challenges me, no practical film effects to make Trump fans look more violent than AntiFa or vice versa, and DEFINITELY, no fucking nonsense like “The mainstream news media is lying about literally everything, unlike the site run by the ‘Gay Frog Water’ guy”.

I also seem to recall his proof for chemtrails being either “open your eyes” or tearing off his shirt while screaming again.

I always wanted this blog to stay away from politics (as you may have noticed if you’ve so much as scanned your eyeballs over the header). I wanted to make fun of everyone who took politics seriously and recited buzzwords to sound “woke”, or just stick to something I care about like film or social network trends (the less obnoxious thing to do, I assume). But alas, a fucking television star was made the leader of the free world by 4chan dwellers and memelords, so I’d say nobody is ever again allowed to utter the words “stay out of politics” to anyone.

Ultimately, my view of modern-day politics is simple: you’re either a cunt, or you’re an asshole. I, personally, am a dick so I fuck everyone.

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“Speaking of YouTube and politics, what are your thoughts on Laci Green thing?”

I touched upon this in a recent video and as you may have deduced from that, I don’t mind the fact that she’s reaching out to these “YouTube rant” artists and Rational Skeptics as one of the most notorious third-wave-feminists, aiming to start a more productive discussion. Alas, I can agree that she seems to be changing her own mind moreso than she’s changing anyone else’s so maybe this was just something she said to justify the fact that she’s playing patty-cake with Chris Ray Gun now?

And for those of you who don’t know, yes, this is hot shit in online political discourse right now. I rest the bajeezus out of my case.

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“Favorite new Twin Peaks character?”

Dougie-Cooper.

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“Why do you eat so much junk food? You know that’s bad for you, right? RIGHT?!”

I actually didn’t, thank you. No but seriously, I’m an advocate for the idea that you should eat whatever you damn well please, especially if you compensate for the unhealthy stuff with excercise and other habits (as it turns out, alcohol makes you less likely to suffer from clogged arteries).

Even so, I think it’s weird how people have somewhat recently started delivering hot takes on fast food again, like it’s somehow breaking news. I’m noticing more and more people patting themselves on the back lately for posting links to “Fries make you become dead” articles or “unveiling” the way chicken nuggets are cooked in Facebook videos, pointing out that McDonald’s may not be the healthiest thing on the planet, usually with some smug caption like “but at least it tastes good, right?”

Yes, you godforsaken fuck, it literally still does. The only thing you’ve proven is that goo made from ground-up chicken babies is surprisingly delicious and also that it’s not very good for you – because again, nobody who eats at McDonald’s have any healthy habits to even things out best they can.

Not you again!!

It reminds me of the outrage that took place in Sweden about 4 years ago, where it turned out that our minute steak and roast beef contained horse meat and everyone promptly lost their collective shit. Even when considering the false advertisement, why did this warrant a nation-wide shit-fit? Again, the only thing you guys “exposed” was the fact that horse meat is pretty good and that meat doesn’t become less edible because it comes from a “cuter” animal. It’s like watching one of those cartoons where a character is happily eating something unidentified only to spit out once he learns what’s in it.

But honestly, the absolutely funniest hot take about McDonald’s I’ve seen people parroting lately is the idea that the food “actually” tastes terrible; it’s just companies want to make us THINK we like it. We don’t REALLY want to go to TGI Fridays, KFC, or McDonald’s. The food has just been seasoned, prepared, and experimented upon in such a way that it becomes addictive and irresistible, all so that corporations can make money out of chumps like me.

So the main argument for why McDonald’s is bad is that it has literally been made to taste absolutely delicious (an idea other restaurant chains don’t aspire to cash in on, apparently). It’s disgusting because it’s good. That’s totally your argument. You can’t say I’m wrong; I’ve already made a joke about it! Hah!

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“So, what are your plans THIS summer you slacker?”

Well, now that all the exams are finished and I don’t have to read a bunch of shit anymore, I figure it’s high time to catch up on some reading I actually want to do. I already got a bunch of Red Dwarf books, another Dark Crystal prequel, and The Thing Explainer for my birthday and I plan on getting my own copies of shit like Hitchhiker’s GuideAlice in Wonderland, Cryptonomicon, and Gödel, Escher, Bach so dad can finally have his copies back after all these years. I’m not very good at this.

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“Ugh, I used to think you were smart but now you’ve started shitting on alternative media and Trump. How does THAT work if you’re so intellectually honest?”

Good luck on your path.

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