In this exciting new episode, we learn the truth about Wilfred, Lex finds out something shocking about his wife Lois, a female hero and a masked assassin exit the shadows, the hunt for the alien artifact continues, and Jesus “CarpenThor” Christ battles a new enemy – Kingpinferno. Basically, this film has way too much crap going on at once. I have succeeded. Pay up, DC!

Why do I keep doing this, you ask? Because y’all deserve a better superhero movie than Suicide Squad.