Going to this site made me feel like a kid on New Year's Eve all over again.

Going to this site made me feel like a kid on New Year’s Eve all over again.

Well, folks. It looks like we made it. It truly looks as though we all survived the date which was, once and for all, going to be the end of the world as we know it. No stupid Harold Camping prophecies, no faulty Y2k-ish theories, no silly rapture warnings, but the one and only true end of all things. The day allegedly predicted by the Mayans ages ago. December 21st, 2012. So, yeah. Is anyone genuinely surprised that it didn’t actually happen?

I gotta say, even though I didn’t believe that we were truly going to die, the days leading up to this date have actually been pretty fun and hearing all the numerous theories as to how the world will perish has been fascinating. There have been theories that we would collide with another planet like in Melancholia, speculations about the dawn of a new ice age, guesses of a total worldwide technological blackout, fears of a possible meteor strike, some Vogons just doing their job and a bunch of other stuff that the very scientists of NASA themselves were able to rebut before anyone could take it seriously.

I don’t even quite understand what the end of the Mayan calendar signifies? Isn’t it just marking the date of the end of an epok – a date which happens to be today? How is the fact that a calendar has reached the final page supposed to indicate that the apocalypse is going to take place? I’m not really sure, but it does bring me to another, though not really serious theory which I discussed with Simon Allinggård the other day, which is that the end of the Mayan calendar doesn’t indicate the end of the world, but the end of time, and that once the bell tolls 00:00 on December 21st, time will start moving backwards until we all become sperms, evolve back into sea bacteria and the Universe implodes in on itself. That would be pretty interesting.

But the most hilarious theory by far has to be the one that the doomsday wasn’t actually forseen by the Mayans, but by the French seer Nostradamus, who has apparently made predictions ages ago that strangely match tragic events that took place long after his passing, like the Pearl Harbor bombing, 9/11 and the Kennedy assasinations. Well, in this particular case, his prediction was apparently that the world is going to end on the day that Psy’s music video “Gangnam Style” – you might know it – reaches 1 billion views on YouTube, which indeed turned out to be the day of the winter solstice, i.e. December 21st.

His quote went a little somethig like this:

“From the calm morning, the end will come. When of the dancing horse the number of circles will be 9.”

I’m not sure if he actually did write this or if this is some bullshit invented just in time for the end of the world, but I digress – you see what he means right? The circles will be nine. 1 billion. 9 zeroes. 9 circles. Dancing horse. The “Gangnam Style” dance. Also, Korea is known as the country of the calm morning. There used to be a funny documentary about it on YouTube, but it has since been deleted.

True, they never presented any theories as to how the world will end, whether it explodes, freezes or gets hit by some stray asteroid once Psy’s video reaches the golden number. But I think the reason would be that “Gangnam Style” has gotten so irritatingly overplayed that the Earth finally decided to commit suicide.

So yeah, the theories have been fun, and I gotta say that when I went to domsday countdown sites like terriblefate.com – which has proven to actually have been the countdown for the release of a 3ds version of Zelda: Majora’s Mask AND a tribute album to the game, hence the usage of that face on the site, which is indisputably some of the most clever marketing I’ve ever seen – I did enter a fitting mood and for a second or two, I did feel as though the world maybe was going to end after all. I’m almost a little disappointed. But hey, it’s still the 21st in some parts of the world. There’s still a chance, right?

As it looks, though, we’ve made it. We’re alive and well. So let’s annoy this planet with our stupidity for a few centuries more, shall we?

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