Please, Facebookers; unless those chicken nuggets or burgers are actually made of something lethal, stop sharing that “disgusting” photo some guy posted showing the “stuff” they put in our fast food these days, just to make me stop eating at McDonald’s!

I don’t understand why I should want to stop eating something just because I know what the stuff it’s made of used to look like at one point! I have seen finished chicken nuggets and they look good. I have eaten them and indeed, they taste good. “Gee. Thanks, Facebook. Now that I know, thanks to the photos you’ve been passing around, what the food once used to look like, I will never eat that crap again!” Oh, brother.

May I request that all you fast food haters stop whining about what the stuff is made of? I know already that it’s bad for me, obviously, but I don’t eat it too often and when I do I still enjoy it, even if another one of your “frightening” Facebook-pictures is trying to turn me off by showing me what they put in their food. Sorry, guys. As long as the stuff they put in it doesn’t kill me on the spot and the food still tastes nice, I don’t give a flying smeg.

It’s even funnier when vegetarians nag and preach about food, because I know that some of them try to prove a point by sharing photos of animals getting killed. Wow, are you telling me my burger is made of a cow? No way! We live in a world where farm animals are used to feed us smarter animals after they’ve outlived their usefulness? Say it isn’t so! Look, I may be opposed to animal cruelty but I’m not opposed to the circle of life. I’m not against the way the world’s food chain always has and always will work.

As you may have guessed by now, I am the opposite of a vegetarian. To me, vegetarianism is merely refusing the circle of life. What I am saying is that vegetarians who preach in front of hundreds of people about why eating cows is wrong and heartless would be about as lucky trying to preach in Africa in front of a hundred lions about why eating gazelles and zebras is wrong and heartless. If humans, as PETA insist, are equal to animals, then a human killing and eating innocent cattle should be just as serious and bad as a lion killing and eating an unsuspecting zebra.

We are all technically animals, you see. Lions eat zebras. Humans eat cows. That’s how it’s always worked and that’s how it always will work, and if some humans choose plants over meat, that’s totally fine – just don’t preach tediously because you live in the illusion that you’re doing the “right thing”.

(Yes, I’d even eat a chicken head. What of it?)