I’m sure we all remember the Twitter trend from a few weeks or so back? It was called #prayforbiebersgrandparents or something, and it was apparently created after Justin Bieber tweeted about his grandparents getting mildly – no, not severely but mildly – injured in a traffic accident, because evidently Bieber-fa… oh, I mean “Beliebers” are so stupid that they weep over Bieber’s relatives even if they aren’t badly hurt.

This trend was around for quite a while, and oh boy – reading some increasingly moronic tweets with the hashtag #prayforbiebersgrandparents was quite simply priceless. Apparently one girl cried so much that she vomited… because of someone else’s grandparents… who weren’t badly hurt… at all. I’m sorry, my blog is too family friendly for me to write what fate I am wishing upon this girl right now.

But this wasn’t the last instance of extraordinary Belieber-stupidity on Twitter. When I logged in on Twitter the other day another hashtag was trending; this one was #PrayForKenny. Yeah, apparently something horrible mild and/or trivial happened to one of Justin’s boyfriends bodyguards, one named Kenny, which prompted an army of empty-headed tweens to have at it again and spread the message that we should all pray – even though the concept of God is still non-sensical to any intelligent human – for some guy whom none of us gives a rat’s ass about. Why should we pray? Well, because the person we’re praying for is associated with Bieber of course! Yeesh, you morons nauseate me.

I actually partook in this trend, by writing the following tweet:

“Sorry Justin Bieber-fans, ‘South Park’ has taught me that those named Kenny are SUPPOSED to die. No I won’t #PrayForKenny.”

I’m hoping this tweet infuriated at least one or two Bieber-fans Beliebers Bieber-fetishists and that they will make at least a little bit of a big deal out of it. No matter the consequences of my tweet, I shall defend it with a motto of mine when it comes to joking: “It does not matter how cruel or sadistic it is; jokes are never meant to be taken seriously.”

That is all, dear readers. Always know where your towel is.