Barbarian: “Can you help me, boy?”

Simon The Sorcerer: “I can’t help. I’m pedophobic.”

A while back, me and a few people I know were discussing something that occured on our school a few years ago. Of course, I shall refrain from naming any names.

There was this rumor going around that a female student had gotten invited into the janitor’s room, where the two had sexual intercourse. A large amount of students and school staff denied these rumors, but I must say that it was hard for me not to believe them as even the girl kept insisting they were true; she seemed proud, she did. It naturally got truly chaotic but I’m not here to write about what happened then, but what happened much more recently.

Me and some people I know were talking and such, when suddenly the incidence was brought up. After most of us had agreed that this janitor-bloke was creepy, if the stories are as true as the girl said they are, this one girl spoke up, saying she didn’t see what the big deal was. She wasn’t kidding, mind you; she looked genuinely baffled as to how it could be viewed as wrong that a little girl allegedly slept with a grown man. Indeed, when did paedophilia become a crime?

Now, we were also pointing out the fact that the girl who allegedly “got some” was actually one year younger than her classmates – not sure how THAT works unless all her classmates were held back a year, but whatever – thus we came to the conclusion that she wasn’t even in her teens when this occured. She was 12! So, you tell me, dear readers. What do you suppose is wrong with a man in his late 20’s sleeping with someone who still believes Twilight is the best book ever published?!

“Yeah but, what’s wrong with having sex with a 27-year old guy, huh? What’s so wrong with that?!”

The imbecility of some people baffles one, certainly. One must roll ones eyes and sigh.